Thursday, December 1, 2011

Spoon Suit Man: Part 6 (Spidophile)

When we last left our hero he was unaware that his sidekick, Ben Spencer, had been knocked out and kidnapped. - Lauren






Sometime later Ben woke up with a headache. His phone was ringing on the floor. Ben reached down to answer it but his arms were stuck to his body with some sort of sticky rope. As his eyes adjusted to the dark, Ben realized where he was and what position he was in and screamed like a little girl.

"AAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!" he shrieked as he struggled in the giant spiderweb in which he was entangled.

"Save your strength," advised a rich, accented voice from somewhere in the darkness. "You'll never break free."

"Who are you and where am I and why am I here and where's Sven and who's calling me?" squeaked Ben hoarsely.


"I believe Mr. Spencer is calling you, which means he is probably at home and has read the ransom note which I left there for him. As for where you are will remain a mystery- as a precaution."

"But who are you?"

"Oh, Ben, you know me!" said the increasingly familiar-sounding voice as Jazmin stepped out of the shadows. Ben gasped so hard he hiccuped.

"Jazmin *hic* you speak *hic* with an accent *hic* !"

"No, before I was speaking with an accent, now I am not." Jazmin smiled, and Ben noticed something odd.

"What are you wearing *hic*?!?" he hiccupped, meaning the red and black spider costume. 


"Oh, did I forget to mention, Ben? I'm The Avaricious Arachnid."

Ben gasped, making him hiccup again.



"You mean - you're really Spider-Woman?"


The Avaricious Arachnid gasped. "How did you know?"


"What? Really?" Ben said. "Then you're from Marvel Comics?"


"Wow, way to read sarcasm, kid." said the Avaricious Arachnid dryly. "Of course not. I was merely trying to be funny. Don't you read the script?"

The Avaricious Arachnid held up a piece of paper with the words:

                            Avaricious Arachnid: (sarcastically) how did you know?

Ben frowned. "How - " he began.

"Silence!" shrieked the Avaricious Arachnid, reveling in the power all villains enjoy when they have the helpless damsel-in-distress or loyal sidekick held captive.

"Okay, okay," muttered Ben, "Pushy, pushy. I'm glad I found out who you really were before I spent $25.00 on you."

"Oh, Ben..." said the Avaricious Arachnid, reverting to her Jazmin voice, "Don't you like me?"

"Not really," said Ben.

"Me neither," said Sven Spencer, emerging from the shadows.



Will Sven be able to rescue Ben? Or will the Avaricious Arachnid succeed in destroying both of her enemies? Check back Friday to find out!


Read the next section: Spoon Suit Man Part 7

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