Sven hit the wall with a thud, breaking the framed newspaper article about Spoon Suit Man. Verlierer cackled as Sven slid to the ground, broken glass tinkling down the wall beside him.
He shook his head groggily. "Wow, Verlierer, you sure can-"
Crash! Sven was forced to roll out of the way as Verlierer's spiked club swung down upon him.
"NO ONE INSULTS VERLIERER THE GERMAN!"
"Ben!" he yelled.
"THIS BEN CANNOT HELP YOU. HE IS A SCHLAPPSCHWANZ!"
"Stop saying that word!" snapped Sven, jumping out of the way once more.
"I WILL SMASH YOU, SWEDISH SCHLAPPSHWANZ!"
"J.E.R.O.S.L.A.V.!!" yelled Sven, ducking under the swinging club. "Get me SS20!"
"May I point out, sir, that though you are of Swedish ancestry, you are not in fact a Swedish citizen as this German seems to think?"
"Yes, thank you, J.E.R.O.S.L.A.V., that was very helpful, now get me SS20 right now!!!!!!!!!"
"Very good, sir."
Verlierer grabbed Sven around the neck with one mighty hand and pinned him up against the wall.
"YOU ARE JUST A TINY FLEA COMPARED TO THE MIGHT OF VERLIERER! I WILL SMASH YOUR INSIGNIFICANT HEAD!"
"Wow," gasped Sven, struggling to talk beneath the crushing weight of Verlierer's pinioning hand, "that was a big word for you to use."
"Sven, are you going to come eat your cheesecake?" asked Ben, shoveling down his slice while watching the ongoing battle.
"Go ahead and eat it," gasped Sven.
"Thanks," said Ben.
"I was... being... sarcastic." Sven struggled for breath.
Verlierer raised his spiked club.
"AFTER I SMASH YOU I WILL SMASH YOUR SCHLAPPSCHWANZ SIDEKICK!" yelled Verlierer.
"Is that supposed to be a threat?" said Sven.
"Hey!" said Ben, offended.
"Well, stop eating... cheesecake and come... help me!" howled Sven.
"According to the Super Hero/ Villain Lunch period laws..." began Ben.
"Sir, your SS20." A slot opened up in the wall, and a spoon fell out.
"Thanks," gasped Sven. He winced as the spiked club smashed into the wall, inches away from his head.
"HOLD STILL, SWEDISH SCHLAPPSCHWANZ!" thundered Verlierer.
"Verlierer," gasped Sven, "prepare to ingest a spoonful of justice!TM"
And with that, Sven deployed SS20.
Verlierer dropped Sven to the floor as the spoon began unfolding Sven's portable armor.
"Woah," said Ben, dropping his cheesecake fork.
"Thanks," said Sven, as the armor adhered to his body, "the one downside to this one is that there is no helmet."
"THEN I CAN STILLL SMASH YOUR SWEDISH SCHLAPPSCHWANZ HEAD!" roared Verlierer.
Will Sven escape Verlierer's crushing club? Will Ben come to his rescue? Or will Verlierer smash the schlappschwanz? Find out on Thursday!
Next section: Spoon Suit Man part 14 (Spidophile)
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